Archive for the ‘Dealing With Emotion’ Category


Summary – How to make use of emotion

Emotion is a very powerful tools given to us. Just look at the previous entry, the emotion is there, we forget about it, it will come to haunt us. Being that powerful, it is only right that we know exactly how to make use of them

These are a list of what I can come up on how to make use of emotion.

1) In love
A guy in love should use that emotion to motivate him to be a better person. If the girl doesn’t like a smoker, he should use that motivation to stop smoking.

He shouldn’t use his love to justify him stalking her, or harassing her.

2) Anger
A foreman of a factory should be easily be angry if someone’s tempering with his machine. If that machine is down, he will have to answer to the manager.

Imagine a foreman who doesn’t care if anyone damaging his machine simply because he doesn’t care

3) Happy
Nothing can go wrong with happiness. And the best way a person can make use of his happiness is to infect another person with it. This is usually done automatically. You see a person laughing out loud, the tendency is you will smile at least 🙂

4) Jealousy
A student and his roommate. The roommate is so clever, he’s always praised by lecturers. The student is now jealous of that. He should use that jealousy to strive and work harder, so as to get the same appreciation.

Never, and I mean never.. the student use his jealousy and start sabotaging the clever roommate ~ introduce him to clubbing maybe

5) Sad
A boy is so sad when his grandfather passed away. He is now living with his grandmother. He can cry all his want, but from his sadness, he should be thankful that he still has a grandmother. He will then appreciate her more ~ not hurting her feeling etc.

– I wonder –
What do you think? Can you guys come up with a scenario where we can make use of our other feeling? Maybe like greed, shy, hate, scared etc 🙂

———– Personal Note ———–
Emotion really is a funny thing. Sometime you are so in love, then something happen.. and he/she immediately become the one person you hate the most. Sometimes you are so nervous waiting to be interviewed, and when your time comes.. you are so nervous that you become oppositely brave. They ask and you answer… “whatever happen, so be it”

funny right?

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Tracking emotion through time

Summary – Tracing back emotion through out time..

Can I ask? Have you ever had this feeling? You go through your day as normal. You know you are alright emotionally when you woke up this morning, many things happened since then… and suddenly maybe during lunch, you have that feeling that something is wrong. You’re not feeling comfortable as if there’s something offending you or hurt your feeling, Or is it you’ve forgotten something? You are not sure what it is… but something is definitely wrong. You just don’t know what it is.

Familiar? Happens to me all the time… 🙂 So assuming you are having the same feeling from time to time, what do you do about it? Do you start to panic, or just completely ignore it.

In my case, it happens usually if I do something hurtful to somebody else. For example, if I accidentally hurt somebody else’s feeling. I would feel it right away. And the feeling will not stop unless I confront him/her and apologize or solve the problem with him/her. I guess I just want to live in harmony with everyone

The interesting part is sometimes, at the time I hurt that someone, I don’t feel a thing. Maybe due to the emotion or what. And after some time, I totally forget it. Then the feeling I described earlier came, and I just can’t ignore it, because I know I hurt someone, but I don’t know who. I will then trace back my exact feeling throughout the day. For example, “Was I feeling this way when I’m at work just now?”… I traced it until I reached the part where I hurt that someone just now. I realized immediately because I can sense the my emotional change at the time. Can you follow me up to now? heheh

The keyword here is tracing back our feeling throughout the time (Hm maybe a key”sentence”). Does anyone here ever do that? Please share, because seriously it helped. When we know where our devastation started, we can end it effectively. The problem with the majority of us, is we don’t want to dig deeper into ourselves when it comes to feeling and emotion. Some even think of it as weakness.

Conclusion – You feel something wrong precisely at 5pm… Trace it back, Remember your feeling at 4pm, 3pm, 2pm etc. Once you have identified where the change in the emotion take place, deal with them. If you hurt someone, go see him… and discuss, If you forgot to pray Zohor, go “Qadha”, If you forget to logout of your email… immediately go log it out. Please don’t check the newspaper for the evening movies 🙂

– I wonder –
Have you ever have this feeling? And how do you overcome it?

———– Personal Note ———–
I have a confession. I am not very good at being angry at people. I rarely shout or scream at people, even though some of the workers in my mill are really getting on my nerve. I guess, I don’t like the feeling that someone actually hates me.

Not that I never feel angry or suppressing the anger. When it’s needed, I will definitely do what I have to do. There is one quote – “Shouting at people out of anger is like spitting, never lick it back”

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Summary – The key to conquering fear

So how many of us is actually afraid of public speaking? Let me be the first to raise my hand.. I have to admit, however prepared, or confident, I will still feel that feeling of a particular insect flying around in my stomach.

However I do have one good news. Fear not.. everyone is experiencing the same thing. Everyone will have that shaky feeling especially during the beginning of the speech. Alhamdulillah, so far, after the first 30 second of the speech, I tend to forget those feeling entirely and started having fun 🙂

I have this theory. Everyone has their own fear right? And people will often want to throw this fear away from his life. If he is afraid of height, he wanted to be all brave and confident at high places.

It is in my opinion however that to rid our fear away is IMPOSSIBLE. Plain impossible. We can never rid of our fear, irregardless of any treatment. The fear will always be there. We just need to learn to overcome it, to learn how to have that fear but have it under control.

The mistake we always did when we want to conquer our fear is that we try our hardest to get rid of it. We want to be free from the fear. Referring to my previous article that every emotion is there for a reason, I definitely think that the fear will always be there, however you do. We just need to control it better. Not letting it affect our judgement.

For example, conquering fear of cockroaches doesn’t mean that you will have to step on any cockroaches you see. You just need to know that when a cockroach is on your body, you will be able to take a deep breath and find that little turn-off and swipe it away. (I can’t remember the english word for jentik.. help?)

And that’s my friend is how you conquer fear.. Not by eliminating the fear, but to live comfortably with the fear in check 🙂

—- I wonder —-
Do you have any phobia? How do you overcome them? 🙂

——— Personal Note ———–
hm I asked if you have any phobia, when I myself cannot come up with my own phobia. Hm I used to have this “geli” feeling if a cockroach is on me. But not to the extend of panickly screaming. Maybe snake and centipede, but that’s very obvious. Who would want to handle those two right?

So can I just ask… what do you think the best way to overcome any fear? 🙂

p.s. By the way.. I will be going to KL today insyaAllah, for the pc fair 🙂 Anybody’s going there on Friday?

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Summary – Why pain exist

Pulling out teeth without anaesthetic is plain cruel. So it hurts, and most of the time you will cry out of pain.

Have you ever wonder though, why then did Allah created pain? And since we are talking about it, why did the feeling of angry, envy etc even existed?

The answer is simple, it’s because all those feeling are equally important with any other feeling such as happy, joy etc. So what happen if the world exist without ….

1) Without any pain – Well, there will be a lot of people hurting themselves without even knowing it. People using only barehand to hold hot fying pan, They will have burnt skins but since it does not hurt, what’s the harm. The worst thing that can happen, is people will start killing each other without any guilt. There is no pain, so dying is just as normal as fainted.

2) Without any anger – People can bully us how ever they want. They can step on our head, or even call our families names, or insult our religion / country, and still we will accept that naturally. Discipline can never be achieve since anyone can do what ever they want. One word – Chaotic

3) Without any envy – Envy is when we don’t have what others are having, and we want that too. Basically envy is our desire. The world will surely die, since nobody wants anything. Nobody wants to compete. So everyone will live their live without any desire to move forward.


Yes, it is written in about all books on positive thinking to avoid these feeling altogether. But I disagree. I think these feeling is meant for us to use it WISELY. We must know exactly when to be angry, and how much is too much.

In Islam, a husband who let his wife with another man is considered a “Dayus”. “Dayus” is roughly translated as do not dare to be angry and take action. And the husband will be sinful for just being a “Dayus”

Conclusion – Every feeling and emotion is created to be used wisely. And for it to be useful, the limit between too little and too much must be crystal clear

———— I wonder ————
Care to list down other negative emotion.. and maybe you can come up with a continuation to the list, as to what will happen to the world if other negative emotion does not exist?

————— Personal Note —————–
I’m starting a new column in the entry which is “I wonder” column. I will put up a few question there for discussion.

Feel free to provide your own insight to the matter discussed, or ANYTHING in the entry. But if you are clueless on what to comment, maybe you can just put up your thought to the question in the “I Wonder” column. Just trying to make things easier 🙂

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