Archive for the ‘Relationship’ Category

silent

Summary – 10 keywords in your pocket

I’m sure we must all familiar with the concept of Seiton already. I have an idea though.. how about if we branch the idea of Seiton to other things in life.. Non-material things in life?

So how exactly do we apply Seiton to other things in life? One thing come up to mind…

There will be time when you are walking along a very nice guy/girl and you were talking to each other. Suddenly, there’s that silence. Your mind goes blank, No idea whatsoever as to what to say, and from his/her reaction. He/She may be suffering the same thing. Fear not.. You can try this.

Always be prepare with 10 keywords to talk about. Remember, it’s keyword not topics. Examples of keywords are like “Weekend”, “Rambo4”, “LessonInLife.com” :) etc. Anytime you’re stuck use the next one. Lastly, don’t forget to refresh your keywords once you’ve used it. That’s a secret only you need to know :)

Also please understand that those keywords are simply for emergency case only. They should not be used one word after another. If you really need to use up all 10, it can only means one of you is really not good with conversation. Improve on that first.

Another methods to use, is maybe redirecting the topic on another subject, like pointing at a mad man preaching to the traffic light. Comment on him instead of asking question to each other. People always love to comment, especially after the appearance of American Idol etc :)

– I wonder –
What other things you guys do if you run out of ideas in a conversation?

————– Personal Note ————-
I suddenly remembered the classic movie of P.Ramlee (A Malaysian classic movie) where P.Ramlee is dating Saloma, and they had no idea on what to talk about so he asked her about the weather in Africa, some questions about giraffe. Now that is poor keyword choice :)

Can i ask, what keyword are you keeping as spare should your conversation freezes?

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yesno

Summary – A question : How to help the guy figure out his feeling?

A friend of mine who wants to remain anonymous had emailed me quite a long time ago, about a month or so. To her, I want to apologize for being very late in answering your question. Rest assured, any emails sent to me will be answered. And any requested post will be entertained (of course within reason)

She had asked me a question, and she really hopes that everyone reading can give her a point or two on how to solve this problem of hers.

Basically she had fall for a guy she knew. She had not meet him in person but only knew him from the chatting channel on ASTRO.

Describing the guy
She wrote that he is a very good listener and is very caring. In addition to that, they both share the same interest and thus the chemistry.

The problem
This guy apparently is giving mixed signal altogether. Sometimes he will be so loving and romantic, another time.. it’s as if he does not even care about maintaining the relationship.

The question
What can she do to help the guy figure out his feeling towards her? Whether he’s in love with her or he’s not… Whatever it is, I believe she will be able to handle it.. She just need to know which

/end question

To honour her request, I will only give my opinion on the matter in the comment section. Most probably towards the end of the day :)

So guys… here we have a friend in need of help, I’m sure you guys have brilliant advice to give. I, on her behalf, really appreciate it :)

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Summary – Why get into trouble

I am in pain! not any kind of pain, the kind of pain that you suddenly do not have any desire to eat, all food taste ordinary..

I bit my tongue….

Do you remember the song P.Ramlee sang in the movie – Tiga Abdul? “Sedangkan Lidah Lagi Tergigit, Apa Pula Suami Isteri?”. Roughly translated, even the tongue sometimes bitten, so does the relationship between husband and wife. Which means difference in opinion between husband and wife is very normal and will happen.

It occurs to me, the tongue obviously will be bitten once in a while, because it is located right in the vicinity of teeth. So it’s no surprise if the tongue get bitten. The risk is always there.

Relationship wise, arguing and difference of opinion is just as normal, but maybe unlike the teeth and the tongue, we can just minimize the risk of having an argument. Maybe by setting up some rules to follow. A few that comes to mind would be like

  • Family will always come first. So it’s a big no no to ask your spouse to choose between you and his/her family.
  • Some people may have a few sensitive issues that he does not like to be brought up. For example, let say the boyfriend doesn’t like it when you comparing him with your previous boyfriend. Then avoid it, Why get into trouble, right?
  • The girlfriend hate it when the boyfriend criticize her cooking, so guys.. Just don’t go there. :)

These are only a few examples I enlisted, Feel free to add some more rules.

In the end, the whole objective of having a relationship is for you to support, complement and provide comfort to each other. If there is a possibility of avoiding crisis or argument, just do that :)

– I wonder –
Is there any other rules that you think important to establish with your spouse?

———— Personal Note ———–
I really am in pain.. it’s hard to enjoy your food when everytime you chew, it hurts. So guys, be thankful for your painless tongue :)

I just sent the mrs to Bangi yesterday. She will be there to help her sister with a secret project or something. When it comes to family, we should always give way..

I’m living a bachelor life now huhu……… (Thanx to azuwachan for the correction :) )

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happiness

Summary – The secret of happiness is “Both of you”

So why do you think married couple cheat on each other like previous joke? The first thing that come to my mind is that they are not happy. Do you agree? Yes, I know that there are thousands of reason why a couple cheat: culture, not educated, lust etc etc. But I strongly believe that not being happy is one of the major factor.

So how can we have a happy relationship? This is secret to happiness, but there is one condition to reading it. It must be read by both parties.. the husband and the wife, the boyfriend and the girlfriend. If you can’t tie him to the chair forcing him to read this, you can just email it to him later :)

The secret is – You put your partner’s happiness first before you (Both of you).

As simple as it is, this will need both of you to practise it for it to work. You see, when we are single, we always take care of ourself. If we are hungry, we cook and eat, if we are happy, we smile to nothingness. So logically when we are attached to someone, we want that alone life to change, right? Before we are hungry, our better half already asked or order food. If we are sad, he/she will comfort us.

I mean, how would you feel when it’s raining outside and you’re hungry, and there’s no food, when suddenly your doorbell rang and it was your boyfriend soaking wet with a burger or “nasi lemak” in hand. You were not even asking. (I think this incident is from a novel that the mrs have me read hehe)

That is happiness. the feeling when you know that someone is looking after you, taking every possible opportunity to make you smile and comfy. Wait for you to eat together. Give up the chicken wing just because he know you love chicken wing.

And now imagine both of you are doing the same thing. How can you not be happy then. Remember.. the secret lies in the word “Both of you”.

What do you think? Do you agree?

—————– Personal Note ——————-
I dedicated the entry to my soon-to-be-married bro. :) I wish all the best with you. Trust me, it’s going to be a tough road ahead. So many unknown things, and the worse part is you are not going to find the solution in blogs or books. You will just have to equip yourself with knowledge, and start from there to solve everyday’s problem.

However, knowing how resourceful you are.. I’m not at all worried, you will do just fine bro :) happy planning the wedding!

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