Summary – Don’t lie to yourself, you’ll know
When people actually say “think positive”, what comes to your mind. Let say you were fired by your boss from work, what would you say to yourself?
- Everything will be okay
- I will definitely get another job in a few days
- This is a good thing for me
Any other answers? For me, all these answers are a good example of a more positive thinking. Trying to look at the positive side of things. They are far much better than –
- I’m going to die of starvation
- I’m such a loser
- Everyone hates me
Don’t you agree? However, when you think about it. Do you really know that things will be okay? Do you really know that you will get another job ASAP? And is it really a good thing to be sacked from a company?
The truth is all those words are only words to calm yourself down. It is always better to be calm and positive than panicky and negative. However, they are still basically lies we tell ourselves. And deep down inside, we actually know that.
Now that’s my friend is why positive thinking is always very hard to do, and sometimes it will do more harm than good. Unless of course you know the proper way of positive thinking..
The actual proper way to an effective positive thinking is to acknowledge what has happened first.
In this specific example, we must first acknowledge that we are fired from the job. Never try to comfort us by saying that the company made the biggest mistake by sacking you, or that you will get better job etc.
Acknowledge first that you are fired. It’s real and whatever it is, it’s done. Whether you want to believe it or not, you are now jobless. And whatever future maybe will depend ENTIRELY on how you react to this.
Once you had acknowledge this, I can assure you your fear of being fired will reduce drastically. Because you’ve dealt with the issue. You can now move on by planning what exactly should you do to overcome this problem.
That is positive thinking – the way of thinking that will benefit you. Not the lies you told yourself for comfort. Let say you tell yourself that you will get a job in 2 weeks. And unfortunately you remain jobless for over a year now, just imagine the damage done to your mind with the frustration.
Rule of thumb : Positive thinking is when you said something to yourself that will make good things happen.
Examples of positive thinking words
- I know it will hurt, but I have no time for that. I will fight with all my energy to watch my baby grow. To teach her everything I know about life and see her be the smartest girl on the planet. (To be said when fighting for life during delivery)
- I fail the exam, which means I am given a second opportunity to fix my life. I now know exactly what it takes to succeed.
- Accidents happened to me as a reminder that I need to improve my driving skills. Good thing it is only minor accident
Examples of positive thinking that lies
- This will not hurt.
- I am going to excel next time
- It’s not my fault the accident happened. I’m just not lucky
Examples of negative thinking
- If I die, my baby will still have her father
- I’m stupid
- Some people are just not meant to drive
———- Personal Note ———-
I actually dedicate this post to my wife, the mrs. She is now in her 9th month of pregnancy. And a lot of things come to her mind now, both positive and negative. Can’t blame her since this is our first baby.
Mothers, any comforting words for her? please