“The best kind of friend is the one you could sit on a porch, swing with, never saying a word, and then walk away feeling like that was the best conversation you’ve had.” – Unknown Quote
Beautiful isn’t it? I received this quote via email from a friend and I ask myself – “if only I have 10 such friends, I will be set for life, no need to find other friends”.
But how can I find such friends? Here a few test that may help you figure out “best kind of friend” from “just friend”.
1) Ask a friend out for a drink. The reason this is tips number 1 is because we need to determine where we stand in the friendship. Just know that it’s a bad sign if everyone suddenly need to visit their sick aunties.
- He agree = +1 point
- He disagree = -1 point
2) Ask questions. One of the most annoying thing a friend can do is if he talk only about himself.
- He stopped sometimes and ask you questions = +1 point
- He keeps talking about himself one topic to another topic = -1 point
3) Deliberately pause during the chatting for 1 minute. Sometimes we go blank during chatting. I’m sure it happens to us all. Let see what our friend will do in that situation.
- He took the initiative and throw in a topic to chat about = +1 point
- He take out his cellphone and start sending sms = -1 point
4) Check his moral compas. There’s no point in making friend with a serial killer, however supportive he is friendship wise. Throw in some imaginative question like “What is this killer thinking about when they are on a killing spree?”
- He immediately show his disagreement with the killing = +1 point
- He proudly say that he will do it another way = -1 point
5) Plan a secret keeping test. This one you must do before hand. Get a coperative friend (Friend A) and tell him that you are going to share a secret with friend B. This friend A and B of course know each other. Friend A is supposed to check whether or not friend B will spill out the secret you shared with him.
- Friend A inform you that friend B doesn’t tell even after being strangled = +1 point
- Friend B publish your secret in his blog =-1 point
6) Ask for money. This is usually the ultimate test. When you ask a friend for money claiming that it’s an emergency, and the friend straight away lend you, it’s a sign that he is willing to lose his money on you. But of course don’t spend the money. Pay him back after a month or two.
Do not lose good friend over money.
- He straight away give you money without hesitation = +1 point
- He walks away = -1 point
– I wonder –
I’m sure there are more test you can think of. It would be great if you share it here.
——— Personal Note ———– There are hundreds of people we met each day, and everyone can be our friend. But in this hundreds of friends, there will only be about 10-20 that fall into “the best kind of friend” category. And that is why we need to do the test, and determine who they are. It really is a lost if you lose friends as described in the above quote.
Be very certain that the fact you’re testing him remain a secret. Nobody likes to be tested. That can sometimes be seen as not sincere.
There are hundreds of people we met each day, and everyone can be our friend. But in this hundreds of friends, there will only be about 10-20 that fall into “the best kind of friend” category. And that is why we need to do the test, and determine who they are.
It really is a lost if you lose friends as described in the above quote.
Photo credit : Chrys Omori