Summary – 6 most efficient anger management tips
If I ask you “Who is the strongest man on the planet?” I’m quite sure that the name Superman will come up. For those still not sure, Superman is a fictional character from comic books. He was described to be able to lift even a mountain. I’m not sure what good that may do to us. However, there are more than one way to define strength.
There’s a saying that the strongest man is not the person who can lift the heaviest stone, but the person who can control his temper.
Let’s face it, a man with temper is no fun. Most of the time they are plain dangerous to be around with. When asked, almost all of them will say that they just didn’t realize how such emotion build up. It just burst like an active volcano.
Imagine if you can stop an active volcano from erupting. Don’t you think that’s superstrong? Here’s a few tips that may help control one’s temper.
1) Acknowledge that you are angry
As easy as this sound, this is the hardest step of all. However this is also the most efficient way to control your temper. I repeat, it is the MOST EFFICIENT way to control your temper. Once you know that you are angry, you will be more conscious about your reaction and that itself cools you down drastically.
2) Set OK limits
OK limits are actual limits that you set beforehand on when exactly it’s ok to lose your temper. Now you may ask “aren’t we supposed to be controlling the temper, not letting it go?”. Believe me that when you have establish this limits, it will be so much easier to control it.
For example, Let us assume you set the limit as such – “it is ok to lose your temper if somebody is hurting your loved ones”. When you know your limits, you will know that all other incident will not be worth it. Why? because they are not in the OK limit list. Imagine how many time you can avoid losing your temper this way.
It is important to have these limits. Just as it is important to be angry in the right situation. For example, a wife / husband cheating on you. You have every right to be angry. In fact that anger will make it easier for you to take action and move on.
3) Create a mantra
This is my favorite method. Personally, the mantra I always use to control my temper is “Once I spit, I will never lick the spit back”. Roughly translated that whenever I lose my temper I will be responsible to anything that may happen. No regrets or apology.
What’s your mantra?
4) Change position
In Islam, it is proposed that to control one’s temper you should change position. If for example you are standing, consider sitting down. I’m assuming there’s a theory behind it. That whenever we are angry at something, it would be best if we just walk away from being near to the things / person we are angry at.
If you are angry at losing football team, consider walking away to maybe a park or a lake. The farther you are from the match, the more relaxed you will become. How can you cool down when you are still at the match watching your team play horribly.
5) Find a safer way to let it out
In some cases, even after we cool down, the temper is still there inside. It may lessen with time but it’s still there and anything can spark it back to life. You need to get it out of your chest. Talk to your loved ones about it.
How about setting up an email account specifically for you to pour in all your emotion. Write an email of anger to that account and tell yourself he/she is reading it. That should help. I wonder if firstname.lastname@example.org has been taken.
If all else fail, you can try this – Breathe in and out slowlly. Just focus on your breathing. Close your eyes and feel the air going in and out. There.. you are now meditating
Conclusion – There are a lot of technique out there for anger management. They even set up classes just for this. But I truly believe that these five are the most efficient method of all.
Controlling temper is never easy. Do not expect anything less. That is why when you can control it, you can proudly declare that you are the strongest man / woman in the world
– I wonder –
How do you control your temper?
————- Personal Note ————
I’m sorry for the long absence. Work caught up with me. The thing about my line of work is that, I’m on standby 24/7 minus the overtime pay. Sometime I can get very upset thinking about it. But I have made my peace with it.
How have you guys been?
Photo credit – hypertypos