microphone

This post was contributed by Ms Azuwachan in respond to my invitation. She is an IIUM student by day and a talented musician by day n night. For more details on her, please visit her blog Don’t mind the elephant.. it’s very lovable :)

Summary – My First Guest Post – 5 Reasons Why Being Quiet Is Better

After I commented on the article 5 Top Ways To Generate Ideas, I kept thinking of the reason I remain a quiet girl. This is what I can come up so far..

  • I think to talk a lot needs a lot of energy. I always see my father nagging, and usually he will get tired because of his diabetes (Diabetes patients always get tired because of lack of sugar in blood, right?) I thankfully have no diabetes, but still I think shut up is better than wasting your energy talking, huhu~
  • Sometimes people don’t really know what they are talking about. until they start talking bad thing about themselves or others. Believe me, girls do this often (not sure about men). Often what are they saying about others are actually about them as well, and that’s bad, right? Like, ‘membuka pekung di dada‘, even though it isn’t that bad, but still, it’s better to shut up.
  • It’s actually your defense mechanism. To silent yourself is to make yourself calm, to meditate yourself, to heal your inner self. That’s why it is encouraged to keep quiet when you’re irritated, or mad with someone; one way that I always use when I got mad with someone.
  • It shows that you’re mature, rational person who does not follow your emotion,but you follow your brain. Some smart students may be talkative, because they have a lot of creative things to say, but still if one smart student keeps his tongue from worthless words, people will usually still respect him, right? Even a stupid person will be seen as smart when they don’t talk too much, hehe…
  • Lastly, it is clearly stated in one hadith that it’s better to say few words that are necessary only than to talk a lot of words of junk. Hadith successors were not allowed to talk much about a hadith; they only open up when being asked by someone to prevent from getting confused (because they rely much on their memory to remember hadith of Prophet s.a.w).

See, that’s why I’m the most quiet person in my room. I don’t talk much about myself, even to my friends. We only talk about matters that are necessary. But I do laugh out loud, y’know, heheh…

But it’s not wrong to be talkative. However, think before you say, that’s the most important. “Terlajak perahu boleh diundur, terlajak kata, lebam dekat mata” heheh..

Anyway, I would like to see some ideas from everyone here. Some contra statements are also welcomed, hehe…

————— Banji’s Personal Note ————–
So guys.. do you agree with Ms Azuwachan or you strongly believe the other way around? One thing that I am not so sure is about the hadith succesors, and that they are not allowed to talk much about a hadith. Maybe those who know for sure about it can verify it?

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This post has 18 comments.


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  1. 15 Nov 07 4:50 am

    Hehe Guest blogger! Gud idea laa banji ;-D

    I zipped my mouth up when everyone’s suddenly start talking and no one to listen. Like when in bunch or group, you know, they ask u Q, u belum sempat nak jawab suddenly they swift to the next topic.. Haha. Ridiculous. So I prefer to be silent and watch their lips moving all in the same time (only watch coz can’t choose who to listen to). Hahaha.. Esp with girls!! Guys are fine..

    But when in group discussions (like, formal one, in class), i ask and talk a lot… Hate classes where only the teacher can talk. Ok lari tajuk sket. :-p

    Btw, diabetes makes ur mouth dry.

  2. 15 Nov 07 10:51 am

    Well,i am a talkative person but….with my friend only LOL..Ngan member2 rapat..Klo kwn biasa2 je..i’m the quiet 1..But same as Intan,klo dah ber”group”…i akan jadi quiet and prefer 2 listen then opening my mouth..Hurmm..dah lama tak berborak ngan kawan so i call myself quiet la..Agagaga..

    Ade baik and buruk of being a talkative and the quiet 1..Bagi i balance la..If ur talkative,people will easily know u..What u’re like..Mgkn tau ape yg u tak suka and ape yg u suka..So kita mgkn tak akan tersengaja sakitkan ati dia..Tapi if being quiet,kita tak leh nak agak dia suka ke…tak suka ke..melainkan kita tanya..

    Tapi de sebalik nya..klo kita talkative,kantoi abis segala perangai kita..Agagaga..Klo quiet lak,people don’t know u so dia tak dpt nak judge u..Ehehehe..

    So ade baik buruk ar..Klo i,i akan jadi talkative tgk pada keadaan and would be quiet pun tgk pada keadaan..tgk dgn sape kita bercakap dgn..

    Hurmmm..i’m being talkative in my blog..Ahaks…

  3. filantera
    15 Nov 07 2:33 pm

    me:

    mmmmm i agree, lidah adalah daging paling baik dan daging paling tak baik dalam badan manusia

    for me, i depend on the person i talk to,
    ngan family: wakakkakaka
    ngan org tak kenal: slow……….
    ngan geng: kui kui kui kui
    ngan tak geng: …………………………………..
    ngan staf : waktu baik lain, waktu diorg malas lain
    ngan colleague : 😐

    so ntah!

  4. banji
    15 Nov 07 11:54 pm

    intan – I’m sure you will be a great guest blogger here, Definitely a lot of analytical thought that can be shared :) Any ideas.. please email me ya

    It always annoy me people who ask question and then immediately answer. I can understand if the question is to initiate the presentation or discussion, but when it is done in casual chat… very annoying, so I can understand why u prefer to be silent when they are all making noise heheh

  5. banji
    16 Nov 07 12:00 am

    aRa – hm an interesting point of view. bila kita talkative, org mudah mengenali kita. dan selalunya kita sendiri lebih mudah mengenali org. boleh hindar banyak fitnah tu… :)

    tapi betul la mcm aRa cakap, ada baik buruknya. kena tahu limit, masa dan tempat. jgn semua tempat bercakap tak henti2 dan jgn semua tempat tak bercakap langsung hehe

    tapi rasanya.. semua blogger ni takde yg quiet extreme. sbb sedikit sebanyak blog ni buat kita jadi lebih expressive. tak gitu?

  6. banji
    16 Nov 07 12:03 am

    filantera – nice quote. lidah jugak tak bertulang kan? sbb tu kadang2 laju je keluar apa nak cakap, tak tapis2.

    tak pernah lagi dgr filantera gelak wakakakak ka rumah :) gelak sampai keluar nasi kut hidung pernah heheh

  7. banji
    16 Nov 07 12:12 am

    azuwachan – pendapat peribadi saya lak, hampir sama dgn semua org, biar bertempat dan bermasa….

    betul jugak cakap beib dlm shoutbox. biar saya quote – “thats y we are given a mouth and two ears…less talk, more listening..but what are we going to listen to if no one wants to talk? hmmm”

    jadi pendiam ni.. ada masanya baik, tapi dlm zaman kita skrg, kita perlu sentiasa ada confident utk bercakap. boleh jadi diam, tapi bila perlu… kita tak segan silu tampil kehadapan bercakap. rasanya, org lebih memandang tinggi org sebegini, dari org yg terus menerus berdiam.

    mungkin jika berminat, boleh ke salah satu entri sy yg dulu di sini – listening is 40 times more important

    terima kasih sekali lagi pada azuwachan kerana contribution anda. pada kawan2 lain yg berminat… sila emailkan idea2 itu pada saya :)

  8. 16 Nov 07 3:24 pm

    totally agree with azuwachan..

    I talk when i feel necessary and when i am in my comfortable zone..

    During one of our kopitiam session after office..( kumpul2 geng2 lain ministry) everyone seems to have all the story to say.. I just keep quite and guess what.. someone actually do realise it..haha.. ingatkan sudah terlupa aku ada di situ.. haha when he asked i said everyone’s talking..who’ll be listening?”. Padahal memang takde mood nak sembang.penat.

    Saya rasa saya pendiam dari zaman sekolah smpai laa u. dok gtu banji. but in my line of work sekarang nih dah tak buleh..start dari orientation course lagi..dah diasak2 dengan public speaking segala..jadi secara tak langsung dah dilatih jadi byk cakap.. an old friend from school also said i’ve changed.. huh.. but still once in a while my old pendiam self datang balik.. when i need peace.. 😀

  9. banji
    17 Nov 07 12:44 am

    nolee – I do notice that you are very quiet masa kat univ dulu, but then again.. so was I :)

    rasanya kita train mcm mana pun, sifat pendiam kita tu akan sentiasa disitu, cuma kita lebih tahu bila patut guna sifat tu dan bila tak patut.

    berdiam diri mmg menenangkan :)

    ps rindu la nak irc

  10. 17 Nov 07 11:24 am

    salam banji.. hmm i like topic nih..
    talkative is good sb mudah nk dikenali. i was once wished im talkative bukan sbb nk dikenali org instead supaya org tak boring bile borak ngan saya. ngeehee..
    but then banji, girls often said bad things bout themselver and others and you’re not sure whether men does. serupe je. men also said bad things la. seriusly tak tipu. i mean, lumrah la. kita manusia. tak pernah lari dari membuat kesilapan. tipu la kalau saya kata saya tak pernah said bad things. i mean, kalau banji lah kan, tak puas hati ngan seseorg (as an example ya. no offense), pasti ada terselit sedikit kan bad things psl org itu. so its like lumrah. kite boleh kawal, cume kadang2 kite terlepas juga.

    but anyway, saya ngaku saya nih pendiam. dulu sgt obvious but since dh masuk Uni, saya blaja la utk bercakap (you know what i mean kan), as a practice bile nk interview nti and etc. yep, jd pendiam lg best cume jgn sampai org kata bisu sudah la kan.. hehe..

    good topic! :)

  11. banji
    18 Nov 07 12:35 am

    salam diha.. hm rasanya faham perasaan tu, bila takut yg kita ni memboringkan org. kdg2 kita nampak mcm terlalu berusaha lak nak peramah..

    diri sy sendiri, kdg2 otak sy ni cepat sgt bertukar topik. dlm kepala ni mmg make sense, tukar topik tu, tapi utk org yg mendengar nampak mcm kita ni berusaha keras utk berbual. :) tu sy lah… diha mesti cara lain nih.

    actually part yg girls often say bad things tu, ditulis oleh Ms Azuwachan. as for me, sy setuju jugak dgn diha, as long as people are talking, mesti ada yg terbabas. laju sgt kita ni

    glad to have u here diha :)

  12. 18 Nov 07 11:08 pm

    huwaa!! baru hari ni dapat online!!
    anyway, I’m really flattered with your say ‘a talented musician’ at the beginning of this post, huha!!
    and I am so excited to see the readers’ responds. And some of them give me the ideas how to control your words.
    thanks so much bang banji and all, lain kali Insya Allah saya hantar lagi email, ok :)

  13. banji
    20 Nov 07 1:12 am

    first of all, there’s a good topic to start with. :) and secondly, the visitors here are just very nice and helpful.

    There’s no need to worry, as long as we are sharing, definitely we’ll gain more knowledge and experience in the end

    looking forward to ur next contribution :)

  14. 27 Nov 07 1:17 pm

    since the entry was written by my fellow angklung friend, so i better make few comments:

    (Diabetes patients always get tired because of lack of sugar in blood, right?)
    – people with diabetes got high blood sugar wawa.. that’s why they got tired easily.

    Believe me, girls do this often (not sure about men).
    – there are some types of man that include in this category and i think wawa knows better. just refer to whom i befriend with. don’t say they talk less and less everyday. they won’t stop talking and i myself, up to an an extent, can’t stand it. i just need them to shut up!

    To silent yourself is to make yourself calm, to meditate yourself, to heal your inner self.
    – agree! and i think wawa knows me this way.

  15. banji
    27 Nov 07 2:28 pm

    szakif – I’m going to leave the replying to wawa :)

  16. 28 Nov 07 12:29 pm

    zaki!! walaupon kamu lambat sikit tp takpa.
    it’s so true that you’re the most quiet person in your odah gang, after Mawi (he’s not Asmawi Sani btw) and safwan.
    and it’s so true that most of my friends agree that you’re the most reserved, most matured-looking person, because you don’t talk a lot.
    well, about your friends, let them be what they wanna be, it’s annoying sometimes but hey!! they spice up your quiet life right??! plus they make me laugh so much, heheh…
    anyways, miss them so much!! kirim salam dkt depa no!! :)

  17. 01 Dec 07 12:23 am

    menarik tajuk ni. kalo saye, kdg2 sgt byk ckp, kdg2 diam gak. tah ikut mood. tp, kalo ckp ngan “teman tp mesra”, we need to talk ngan dorg kan utk merapatkan relationship. abes tu, cemane kalo ta ckp byk? bile da tade idea ke, ta kan ta ckp kut pdhal prasaan tu na ckp je tiap2 ari. nnt rindu. apakah perlu discuss sumting serious ke, ke jus borak psl mende2 simple je. like a fren of mine, she kept asking me kalo na talk wif a guy, die na lg close ngan guy tu, tp dorg slalu discus psl serius issue, mcm current issue. so, die takut conversation dorg bosan. tp saye lak jenis yg diskus sempoi2 je. so, ta leh tolong die. abes tu, leh ta banji tolong settle kan permasalah ini. emm.. i don’t know how to put in proper words. arap2 phmla ape yg saye cube sampaikan ni. huhuhu. (rasenye da tekuar dr tajuk)

  18. banji
    01 Dec 07 5:11 pm

    moon – :) rasanya faham. kawan moon berhasrat utk lebih rapat dengan teman lelaki dia, tapi sampai skrg setiap kali berbual, mesti tentang hal2 serius. dan tak peribadi.

    InsyaAllah saya cuba beri pendapat sy nanti.. dlm entry2 dimasa depan :) terima kasih kerana bertanya

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