Summary – The key to conquering fear

So how many of us is actually afraid of public speaking? Let me be the first to raise my hand.. I have to admit, however prepared, or confident, I will still feel that feeling of a particular insect flying around in my stomach.

However I do have one good news. Fear not.. everyone is experiencing the same thing. Everyone will have that shaky feeling especially during the beginning of the speech. Alhamdulillah, so far, after the first 30 second of the speech, I tend to forget those feeling entirely and started having fun 🙂

I have this theory. Everyone has their own fear right? And people will often want to throw this fear away from his life. If he is afraid of height, he wanted to be all brave and confident at high places.

It is in my opinion however that to rid our fear away is IMPOSSIBLE. Plain impossible. We can never rid of our fear, irregardless of any treatment. The fear will always be there. We just need to learn to overcome it, to learn how to have that fear but have it under control.

The mistake we always did when we want to conquer our fear is that we try our hardest to get rid of it. We want to be free from the fear. Referring to my previous article that every emotion is there for a reason, I definitely think that the fear will always be there, however you do. We just need to control it better. Not letting it affect our judgement.

For example, conquering fear of cockroaches doesn’t mean that you will have to step on any cockroaches you see. You just need to know that when a cockroach is on your body, you will be able to take a deep breath and find that little turn-off and swipe it away. (I can’t remember the english word for jentik.. help?)

And that’s my friend is how you conquer fear.. Not by eliminating the fear, but to live comfortably with the fear in check 🙂

—- I wonder —-
Do you have any phobia? How do you overcome them? 🙂

——— Personal Note ———–
hm I asked if you have any phobia, when I myself cannot come up with my own phobia. Hm I used to have this “geli” feeling if a cockroach is on me. But not to the extend of panickly screaming. Maybe snake and centipede, but that’s very obvious. Who would want to handle those two right?

So can I just ask… what do you think the best way to overcome any fear? 🙂

p.s. By the way.. I will be going to KL today insyaAllah, for the pc fair 🙂 Anybody’s going there on Friday?

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  1. 06 Dec 07 8:21 am

    hmm.. one thing for sure, I don’t eat rice.
    my mom used to tell me that I would ran away crying when it’s time to eat rice when I was a kid. and she sometimes had to forced me just to eat.
    I don’t know if you call it a ‘phobia’, but there’s a probability that it is a phobia.
    plus, I don’t eat much of anything like mee, bihun, laksa, and many2 more.
    well, psychological barrier is harder than any barriers exist in this world. so it depends on our spirit and motivation to overcome it.

    but still I don’t eat rice until now that I’m already 22 years old, huhu~

    p/s: anyone has any idea of how to overcome this???

  2. 06 Dec 07 4:36 pm

    :)) Banji geli lipas..hohoho…still ke?I lipas ok je..tapi snake..plz don’t…tgk lam tv pon meremang bulu roma.. Tgk depan mata tok sah ckp la..pecut kot..

    Talk abt phobia..i takut bw keta..hohoho..mum and dad bising bab i tak nak ambik lesen..aiyooo…2008 i kena overcome my fear..Dah plan everything..2008 is my year..i’m strong..kena lawan fear..

    Mcmna nak lawan fear??Tempuh je klo i..i pernah takut nak naik rollercoaster..ati nak naik tapi fear bkn main..1 day p theme park..i force myself..smpi bila kan nak takut..Masa naik and blm jln lagi rollercoaster itew..i dah 1 bdn sejuk..lutut tok sah ckp..and guess what??i jerit 3 saat je..selebihnya ketawa..bila dah stop..nak naik lagi lak rasa..Hohohoho…skrg..gian nak naik rollercoaster.. :))

    Banji,ever tried flying fox??I dah try…best sesgt..

  3. 07 Dec 07 12:51 am

    Me!! In my dream… LOL.

    How abt eating gross stuff. Like worms? Can u conquer?

  4. filantera
    07 Dec 07 8:49 am

    i am afraid of………………………..doing mistake…..

  5. 07 Dec 07 8:25 pm


    Hate ’em because they smell funny.
    Would squash ’em on sight so they won’t spread the funny smell all over.

    All fear must be faced and conquered, for fear would lead one to the dark side for the force ……

  6. banji
    08 Dec 07 10:49 pm

    azuwachan – not eating rice for 22 years? wow.. so what do u substitute it with?

    hm can i ask, is it actually hate to eat rice or the feeling afraid?

    to overcome that? hmm do u actually want to eat rice? or are u just happy with the way u are now? Because if ure content with it, there’s no need to change 🙂

  7. banji
    08 Dec 07 10:55 pm

    aRa – skrg dah tak geli, dulu2 la 🙂 agaknya pernah terpijak sekali pastu mula la rasa tak besh dgn lipas ni.

    hm cara yang paling baik nak tackle fear ialah dgn gagahkan diri jugak kan? good for u boleh tukar fear of rollercoaster to joy 🙂 erk sy sendiri tak pernah naik roller coaster. flying fox pernah 🙂

    anyway.. good luck 2008! dpt lesen nanti, kena drive hati2 tau..

  8. banji
    08 Dec 07 11:07 pm

    Intan – eww, I personally think that eating gross stuff like those in fear factor is just plain gross 🙂 nothing to do with fear heheh

    medically, what do u think of eating worm?

    filantera – a perfectionist 🙂 i know the feeling, I think I used to be one. even though we know that mistake is a good thing to learn from, it is still hard to let go right?

  9. banji
    08 Dec 07 11:09 pm

    Deimos Tel`Arin – spoken like a true jedi hehe

  10. 09 Dec 07 10:18 pm

    wow..i wonder how this can help me with my acrophobia..heh..its kinda annoying sometimes u know..i hate to admit but i really scared to get to a high place(but i love travel in an aeroplane..hehe)

  11. banji
    10 Dec 07 1:43 am

    bosan – the same principle applies. Don’t try so hard that you go straightaway to parachuting.. start slow

    maybe can start by enjoying the view on the 5th floor for 10 minutes. Increase bit by bit.

    The most important thing to know is that, doing so will not eliminate the fear altogether. What we’re trying to do is just to manage the fear so that it is controllable 🙂

    Tell us how it goes kay

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