I may not have any children just yet. But I have seen examples of “what in my opinion” mistakes parents do while bringing up their children. And these are not examples from tv series or anything. They were actually happening and done by my very own neighbours.
Mistake 1 – Don’t team up. When the father scold the children, the mother must not join the father and scold them. Instead she should play the comforting role and try to explain to the children why they are being scolded in a comforting but stern tone.
Mistake 2 – Do not go against each other. the mother should not go against the father and defend the children unless the children is innocent. In short, both parent should have the same opinion on the matter and the children must know this. It is still recommended that the parent discuss their argument behind the children to avoid lost of sense of authorization.
Mistake 3 – Never spoil the children. It’s a dirty job, but still somebody has to do it. Remember Anakku Sazali? Never spoil the children with love so much that the parent do not dare to scold them or punish them. Children are very understanding, and if explained properly, they will know what were expected of them.
Mistake 4 – Be smarter than the children. They will always test the boundaries of their limitation. Doing so doesn’t mean that they will become a bad person in the future. Some parent prefer to let the children explore themselves, which is good. What I am saying is that parents must always offer guidelines for those angels. For example the children may cheat sometime to see how you react. If no action is taken, they will assume it is ok to cheat.
————— Personal Note ————————–
These are just my opinion. Not being a parent myself, I hope some parents may enlighten me perhaps on their own experience. Children are not some experiment we can redo if we don’t like the results. That’s why we need to learn parenting skills. Read books, google the net.. There is just no other way. Some people claim that their ancestors need not learn this things and still they grow up alright. True.. but we are so connected via internet, why not we learn from each other and avoid repeating those bad-result experiments, Right?
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