When I was studying, one lecturer gave me this story. See… stories make us better at remembering things. I doubt I even remember any formula from his lectures. Basically the story describes what engineering is really about. It is simply problem solving. I am not sure though whether the story is true or not, but I’ll share it with you regardless.

During the early years of space exploration, it is said that American astronaut faced one minor problem. The pen they are using just cannot function properly in zero gravity. If you notice, here on the earth, we usually fail to write something using a pen on surfaces like the wall or the ceiling. In zero gravity, obviously the situation worsen as there is just no force pushing the ink out.

Fascinated, the american spend thousands to overcome the problem. They come up with hydraulic system based pen. It is slightly heavier but then in zero gravity, that will not be a problem.

When the Russia start going into space. They encounter the same problem. they then used pencils.

/end story

The most important step in problem solving is actually defining the problem. You wrongly define the problem, you will end up solving another problem instead of the current at hand. Like in this example, the actual problem is “how to write?” and not “how to force the ink out of the pen?”. How to apply to real life? Simply put, just spend more time analyzing the problem. Redefine it again and again until you know exactly what’s the the problem.

————— Personal Note ————————–
First of all, I appreciate my friends who visited the blog everyday. I only know you via my statistic. For that I thank you with all my heart. I was wondering though whether to change my medium to Malay or stick with English? I’ve had some feedback that some people may not be comfortable with english and thus prevent them from writing any comment. To tell you the truth, what keeps me motivated to keep writing besides my newly found passion for writing, is the 20+- regular friends visiting this blog everyday. Again I thank you. If it’s not much trouble, do leave me some comments ya, Malay or English. I don’t mind. Just want to know the 20 of you better 🙂

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I may not have any children just yet. But I have seen examples of “what in my opinion” mistakes parents do while bringing up their children. And these are not examples from tv series or anything. They were actually happening and done by my very own neighbours.

Mistake 1 – Don’t team up. When the father scold the children, the mother must not join the father and scold them. Instead she should play the comforting role and try to explain to the children why they are being scolded in a comforting but stern tone.

Mistake 2 – Do not go against each other. the mother should not go against the father and defend the children unless the children is innocent. In short, both parent should have the same opinion on the matter and the children must know this. It is still recommended that the parent discuss their argument behind the children to avoid lost of sense of authorization.

Mistake 3 – Never spoil the children. It’s a dirty job, but still somebody has to do it. Remember Anakku Sazali? Never spoil the children with love so much that the parent do not dare to scold them or punish them. Children are very understanding, and if explained properly, they will know what were expected of them.

Mistake 4 – Be smarter than the children. They will always test the boundaries of their limitation. Doing so doesn’t mean that they will become a bad person in the future. Some parent prefer to let the children explore themselves, which is good. What I am saying is that parents must always offer guidelines for those angels. For example the children may cheat sometime to see how you react. If no action is taken, they will assume it is ok to cheat.

————— Personal Note ————————–
These are just my opinion. Not being a parent myself, I hope some parents may enlighten me perhaps on their own experience. Children are not some experiment we can redo if we don’t like the results. That’s why we need to learn parenting skills. Read books, google the net.. There is just no other way. Some people claim that their ancestors need not learn this things and still they grow up alright. True.. but we are so connected via internet, why not we learn from each other and avoid repeating those bad-result experiments, Right?

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One afternoon, a very wealthy businessman came to one beach to relax. He saw one fisherman using his net to catch some fish. The fisherman is very skillful that with each throw he would get a lot of fish. Seeing this as an opportunity the businessman approached him.

Businessman -You sure have great skill there. If you want, I can loan you some money for you to start your business.

Fisherman – Really? I am not that good with business, you tell me what should I do with the money

Businessman – You could buy a boat so you will be able to catch more fish

Fisherman – Then what?

Businessman – With more fish, you can hire more people to help.

Fisherman – Then what?

Businessman – You can then afford to buy a bigger boat and employ people to work for you

Fisherman – Then what?

Businessman – (Getting annoyed) Then you can quit your job and spend more time with
your family. Isn’t that what we want in the end?

Fisherman – Why bother doing all that when I am now already spending most of my time with my family. Thank you for the offer.

Businessman – (silence)

/end story

Both of them are actually wrong.

The businessman is very optimistic and highly ambitious, which are very good qualities to have.

However he should know already what to achieve with his way of life. His final answer actually should be to improve the quality of life for the fisherman and his family. If he still don’t know what he wants with his life (Which generally describe me and maybe major population of the world), he would probably never get it forever.

The fisherman is worse. He may know what he wants with his life, but he doesn’t have any desire to improve himself. He is just plain lazy. And maybe sometime relate this to being thankful to Allah (Syukur and Redha). He could at least try right?

Quoting – “Allah will not change the fate of any person if that person did not even attempt to change it”

————— Personal Note ————————–
As you may have noticed, I loved this type of story. Why? because it is very easy to remember and very easy to relate the lesson hidden with real life application. Remembering my years of studying, I once flunked my subject simply because I got carried away with my other activities. No objective… No priorities and no plan to achieve it. Hopefully the story help

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There is always this fear when we are about to get married.

• “Is him/her the right person for me?”

• “Should I just wait for a better person?”

• “There are also maybe something irritating about the person that we fear we will have to live with for the rest of our life. Am I the only one who can see this?”

Fear not my friend. You are very normal as I believe all living person will have the same thought.

When people asked me this question (Yes… people do ask me this type of question), I usually just quote a phrase – Do not expect to have a wife as perfect as *Siti Fatimah when you are not any nearer to being Saidina Ali. *Siti Fatimah is the wife of Saidina Ali, one of the four Great Caliphs of Islam. Both of them are said to be an example of perfect husband and wife.

There are two points to remember.

• Nobody is perfect. A marriage will be perfect if you know all the flaws of your spouse and still you loved him / her regardless, and of course vice versa.
• Satan hates marriage. Why? Because it will be some sort of firewall for us from doing the forbidden /sin. They will try to sabotage the whole marriage by any means necessary. So most probably those doubt within you is just some persuasion from this nasty creature. A’uzubillahi Min Assyaithonirrojim. Nothing else.

Just think rationally with both wisdom and your heart, with a lot of prayer to Him (Solat Istikharah). You will know what to do. 🙂

* Correction made pointed out by flighteng. Appreciate it

————— Personal Note ————————–
I remember when I got married, the Murphy Law somehow applies. According to the law, anything that can go wrong, will go wrong. 🙂 Nothing big, just that some of the convoy got lost, and in the end… Only the groom (which is me made it to the reception). Luckily everyone arrive just in the nick of time as if everything is according to plan. I still smile whenever I think of this. Any of you guys have funny wedding stories?

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