It’s time. The mrs was 9 days late after her due date. And according to the doctor, she need to be admitted into the hospital for induced labour.

We’ve been preparing for this day since day one, but somehow it seems like we are not at all prepared. I guess it must be all in the mind. A lot of emotion rushing at the same time can make you become very blur. Excitement, scared, wishful thinking, bravery.. if there’s any time to puke, this would be a perfect time.

And that’s just me. I cannot even imagine what it felt like to the mrs 🙂

Since the baby is estimated to be at 4.2kg (which is relatively big in size), the doctors had advised us to undergo caesarean section instead (delivery by surgery). So it’s confirmed, tomorrow (27th May 2008) will be the day we will see our first daughter. Here comes that feeling again.

The clock sure is ticking very very slowly that night. Damn clock…

I woke up at 6 am and hasten to the hospital (Hospital Putrajaya), which is located about 15 minutes drive from my house. 10 minutes drive if I didn’t care about driving over that 70km/hour speed limit.

However, there’s nothing I can do. Husbands are not allowed in the surgery room. According to the nurses, there are a few cases of some husband fainted. If given a choice, I would prefer to be there. Not to see the baby, but just to comfort the mrs. This is the time she will need me the most. And so I was asked to wait at the waiting room. Now that is a very cold room.

I waited for about an hour, but there’s still no news. All I can do is just pray, that everything is alright. And in the mean time do some self comforting. “the anaesthetic will take some time to work, that’s why it is taking a long time” – words like this.

At about 11.30am, finally

Finally a nurse came out asking for me. I quickly asked her how’s the mrs’s condition. She’s doing great. And the baby’s too. Alhamdulillah.

I’m sure you must be very pissed with me if I told you that all of that is just a dream. But it does feel like a dream to me. Seriously. And guess what woke me up from that dream feeling? It’s when I first lay my eyes on her. The most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen. And I didn’t write this because it is a popular phrase.

She IS the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen. And the way she look at me with her black eyes. A surge of new feeling rushed in. I don’t even know how to describe it. But if this is not love, I don’t know what is.

Everything’s perfect. She had my eyes, and her mom’s others 🙂

To tell you the truth, I can write all day describing her to you. But I think I will be doing it the rest of my life. So let me give you a summarized version. An introduction to the new meaning of my life – Zafirah Mohamad Zaki, born on 27th May 2008 10.53am at Hospital Putrajaya.

Thank you to all friends wishing and praying. Only Allah will be able to repay your kindness.

———– Personal Note ————-
Apologize for the low quality picture, it is taken  using a camera phone. Not to worry.. Pocket and his DSLR is coming over tomorrow, and I will keep you guys updated.

A quick update – Today my wife is going to be admitted into the hospital. She is 9 days past her due date and tomorrow she will have to undergo induced labour. A critical time. So please accept my apology if I can’t be updating the blog these few days. I will most probably be there at the hospital the whole time.

Feel free to browse through the archive for some of my previous articles. I guarantee it will be worth your time 🙂

p.s. Wait for the good news, and shh it’s a girl 🙂

“The best kind of friend is the one you could sit on a porch, swing with, never saying a word, and then walk away feeling like that was the best conversation you’ve had.” – Unknown Quote

Beautiful isn’t it? I received this quote via email from a friend and I ask myself – “if only I have 10 such friends, I will be set for life, no need to find other friends”.

But how can I find such friends? Here a few test that may help you figure out “best kind of friend” from “just friend”.

1) Ask a friend out for a drink. The reason this is tips number 1 is because we need to determine where we stand in the friendship. Just know that it’s a bad sign if everyone suddenly need to visit their sick aunties.

• He agree = +1 point
• He disagree = -1 point

2) Ask questions. One of the most annoying thing a friend can do is if he talk only about himself.

• He stopped sometimes and ask you questions = +1 point
• He keeps talking about himself one topic to another topic = -1 point

3) Deliberately pause during the chatting for 1 minute. Sometimes we go blank during chatting. I’m sure it happens to us all. Let see what our friend will do in that situation.

• He took the initiative and throw in a topic to chat about = +1 point
• He take out his cellphone and start sending sms = -1 point

4) Check his moral compas. There’s no point in making friend with a serial killer, however supportive he is friendship wise. Throw in some imaginative question like “What is this killer thinking about when they are on a killing spree?”

• He immediately show his disagreement with the killing = +1 point
• He proudly say that he will do it another way = -1 point

5) Plan a secret keeping test. This one you must do before hand. Get a coperative friend (Friend A) and tell him that you are going to share a secret with friend B. This friend A and B of course know each other. Friend A is supposed to check whether or not friend B will spill out the secret you shared with him.

• Friend A inform you that friend B doesn’t tell even after being strangled = +1 point
• Friend B publish your secret in his blog =-1 point

6) Ask for money. This is usually the ultimate test. When you ask a friend for money claiming that it’s an emergency, and the friend straight away lend you, it’s a sign that he is willing to lose his money on you. But of course don’t spend the money. Pay him back after a month or two.

Do not lose good friend over money.

• He straight away give you money without hesitation = +1 point
• He walks away = -1 point

– I wonder –
I’m sure there are more test you can think of. It would be great if you share it here.

——— Personal Note ———–
Be very certain that the fact you’re testing him remain a secret. Nobody likes to be tested. That can sometimes be seen as not sincere.

It really is a lost if you lose friends as described in the above quote.

Photo credit : Chrys Omori

Summary – WARNING : one of the hardest thing to do in life

The Scenario

Imagine you are in a room. Guess what, there’s a bomb in the room next door and that bomb will only starts to countdown when you enter the room. To make things more interesting, you are a bomb expert, and if anyone can disarm that bomb, it would be you.

What would you do?

The bomb will only tick when someone enters that room. You can be evil by ignoring it, and it’s someone else’s problem. Or you can lock the door to the next room, and finish what ever your business is in this first room (taking your time).

If you choose the latter option, which is taking your time. Will you be worried about the bomb next door? The room is locked, and the bomb is not ticking yet. Why should you be worry?

This is actually the secret to being calm. Which is to live now. Not in the future or in the past, but now.

The Past Person

Some people like to live in the past. They may have done something good, or bad in their past, and they really love to think about that. For example, a man may have received so many rejection from girls that he now doesn’t have any confident to speak to girl. A lot has change to this guy, he may have good job, with good money. His behavior also may have changed to better, but still his mindset is in the past. He still prefer to think about all the rejection he had and thus fail to live in the now.

The Future Person

Another set of people, like to live in the future. They worry too much about their life. What will happen if they didn’t have enough money for retirement? or if there is an accident? Or what if their teenagers rebel and join a cult.

Now this is a tricky one. Don’t stop thinking about the future. But try to differentiate between planning for the future and worrying about the future. Take the retirement issue for example. He can worry all day long, but still he can’t do anything about it. Unless of course he can find an extra one million that day. What he need to do, is to plan how much is enough, and try to work in reverse on how to achieve that amount. As long as he stick to his plan, he shouldn’t be worry at all.

The Now Person

Live in the now. Coming back to the bomb disarmer in the room. What he should do is to take his time, watch some movie, or order some Burger King. Enjoy his “now”. But in the same time, prepare all his tool for the bomb, and maybe brush up his knowledge on the most recent bomb cases. That’s planning.

He should open the door only when he’s ready. And at that time, only focus about disarming the bomb. Nothing else. He shouldn’t be thinking about the movie he just watched or the burger he just ate. Just the bomb.

Don’t you think he is a very calm man?

– I wonder –
Which are you, a past person or a future person?

——— Personal Note ———-
I must admit, I am a past kind of person. I like to linger my mind to the past. My reason is so that I will not forget all the memories since all of them are that precious to me. In my opinion, doing this sometimes is OK. Just don’t let any of the past experience affect you.

Don’t you agree that living in the now is very hard to do?