Summary – Another mind set that require some change, that “our opinion is the only opinion”

Some of my friends did ask me some questions. I graduated in Chemical Engineering from University of PETRONAS, so why didn’t I apply for a job in chemical plant or offshore oil rig. Instead I am working in a palm oil mill. They looked at me as if I had been a failure and that chemical engineering from PETRONAS MUST work in an oil rig, and nothing less.

We Malay, will have a long way to go to have a world class mind if this is the kind of mentality our graduates have.

What in your opinion is the definition of success? It is my believe that the answer is very subjective and it varies from one person to another. So why is it that we have to judge people using our own definition. Our understanding of the word “success” may not be the same way other people understand “success”

Parents in the early years of their children had told them the meaning of success is measured in term of career they will end up. They implanted the idea that successful people are those working as doctors, engineers and lawyers. In a way, this is quite a good method, because it will give the children some direction to work on. But the parents should in time tell the children to find their very own definition of success. please don’t raise them believing that if they are not lawyers, engineers or doctors, they are a failure. Don’t use the same definition of success to the children. They may not be lawyers but maybe they will become a businessman instead. “Datuk lagi” huhu

Anyway… Success for me is how you achieve what you aim. So what do I achieve with my current job?

  • My house is just 1km from my workplace. I have never experience traffic jam, tolls and road accidents (touch wood), I can have breakfast, lunch and tea with my wife everyday (of course dinner also), I can even go back to sleep during my lunch break comfortably on my bed,
  • I only answer to one person, which is the mill manager (no politics whatsoever), I knew exactly what should I do to be promoted, in term of requirements etc (I’ve seen some engineers that have worked so long but canot be promoted simply because no vacancy)
  • True that I may not get paid as handsomely as others, but look at what they’ve been missing. People are given each 24 hours a day, In the end it will all add up. Gain something and loses another.
  • The best thing about my work is that I enjoyed it. Isn’t this the most important things?

Anyone else have had experience alike? being force to believe in something?

————— Personal Note ————————–
My dad had also tried to suggest our future career. I’m supposed to be a lawyer, My second brother – an architect and my third – a doctor. We have no idea then what the job will require us to do, but it did in a way give us a sense of direction. So I’m not really against parent putting ideas in their children head. Because if not, it may soon be corrupted by fellow friends anyway. It’s just that the parents should be open minded and respect the choice their children took (of course only after they were able to know bad from good, “akil baligh”)

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This post has 12 comments.

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  1. k o r o m y s t
    23 Jul 07 5:32 am

    Hey hey, my otou-san wanted me to become a doc but I hated bio and even flunked bio tests during my school years. Managed to pass the paper for SPM though xD

    Went into matrix and had to take up sains bio xD I was like- What the?! Bio, again?! But then bio in matrix was a breeze, much to my surprise. Scored high xP

    So of course, otou-san had high hopes for me into becoming a doc but unfortunately, my pointers were a little short to reaching the med line, if you know what I mean xD Pointers high but not high enough for medic, so I took up Multimedia instead xDDD And it’s a subject I liked very much. No more bio, yay! xD But I had to endure the pain staking maths and statistics ahahah oh well. It was worth it xP

    Eventually, otou-san accepted the fate that none of his offspring were to become doctors since his first took up multimedia and now working in a mmedia firm, 2nd one took up bio but in the end applied for KPLI and became a bio teacher instead, 3rd one is now studying software programming while the fourth is more inclined towards multimedia as well hahaha xDDD

    But otou-san is still pressing me to try government-based jobs. Life’s more secure, he said. Well, yea, it’s true but I don’t really like being all too formal and not exploiting the creativity minds of one person. Besides, I hate setting up systems and databases huhuhu…

  2. Rockafella Gurl
    23 Jul 07 6:06 am

    hye bro! ishkk lama tak bg komen kat ur blog..

    ok, anyway all my ex-college mate hv change most of their career. even they graduate in Art & Design but they ended up in different field.. urmm.. hi hope from parents?? i dun think so.

  3. Banji
    23 Jul 07 8:19 am

    koromyst – and yet all of u are a success, thats how it should be, the father define the success, and drive the children towards it, in the end they create their very own success.. good for u koromyst, i like the story very much, please keep sharing as such ya 🙂

  4. Banji
    23 Jul 07 8:26 am

    yanz – hm i agree, there’s so many graduates working not in the field they study, but it should be ok as long as they are willing to learn, in my humble opinion, university is just the place to prepare a student to be adsorbed into the work force, irregardless of the major, dont u think so

  5. pocket
    23 Jul 07 10:45 am

    hahah… n guess what…
    the dream of becoming an architect
    is still here with me.
    still looking at drawing …
    though its a different drawing now.
    button or knob, car audio thingy…

    dreams is an aim… if a bullet is
    shot without any target… who knows
    where it might end…

  6. noushy syah
    23 Jul 07 1:06 pm


    I thinks parents are supposed to give guidance and be supportive and not a decision maker’ for their kiddies.

    Of course having some expectations and setting some rules for the success of the children would give some ideas for the kids to focus for the future on which path to choose.

    Nevertheless,parents should be flexible should the children show interest non academically, instead of saying no,should go with it but with BUT….no matter how,to finish at least the basic education level before enhancing further…

    A qualified best teacher with flying colours academically doesn’t necessarily means going to be a good teacher especially if been forced to be by parents.

    Don’t we see so many teachers out there without passion in delivering the task…when asked, many will say, I teach for a living and my parents want me to be a teacher…not bcoz I love to teach!!!

    Now, poor students!!…

  7. Banji
    23 Jul 07 2:21 pm

    pocket – good point with the bullet. If shot aimlessly, it can only do harm.

    noushy – the legendary noushy’s back. yerp.. parent should give guidance at least up to the basic education level. that’s why in Islam there is a certain period known as mumayyiz, which translate to the period when the children know how to differentiate the good and the bad. It is when the children reach this age that they start taking responsible for their action.

    and yes… so many teachers and other profession do what they do simply because they were pushed by their parents. Poor them

  8. Noushy Syah
    23 Jul 07 2:30 pm

    And yez, glad to be back here…TQ Banji, kdgkala things hppn beyond our expectation.

    *Geram bila server buat kesah…

  9. filantera
    24 Jul 07 1:01 am

    teringat ayat ni
    “those who can’t do, teach!!…and those who can’t teach, teach gym(PE)!!” hehehheh

  10. Banji
    24 Jul 07 1:32 am

    buzz (bunyi buzzer) jawapannya ialah school of rock eheh

  11. jgn7376
    07 Oct 08 6:20 pm

    ok pe keje palm oil mill…aku pun palm oil mill gak. skang aku punya salary rm9k..tunggu sat gi..bleh dpt 5 fig. kot…

  12. 07 Oct 08 6:47 pm

    Jgn7376 – RM9K? uish.. company mane tu ye? mungkin boleh try apply

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